Out Of Control
by whydontyouallf-fadeaway
Summary: When Marcella enters a fugue after a distressing phone call from Jason and her kids, she accidentally attacks Tim which prompts her to reveal all to him about her past. (Prequel to Day 25 of my OTP challenge)


_A/N: Writing someone in a fugue is not easy considering they have no recollection of it happening so I tried._

Marcella made her way downstairs and into the kitchen, she had just had a bath and she grabbed a beer out of the fridge. She took a sip and placed it on the counter. It always felt far too quiet at the time of the evening and it was even worse when Tim wasn't home yet.

The quietness was unnerving and it briefly sent her into a dissociative trance. The default ringtone on her phone made her jump and she brought her mind back to the real world. Turning around, she saw Jason's caller ID and reluctantly answered the phone, "What do you want?" she barked.

"Well, that's not nice." he replied. Jason barely spoke to her any more and she already found the phone call strange. He had been messing with her head a lot lately since she told him about her blackouts, and she already felt that this was going to be one of those times. "I want to talk about the kids. And me taking custody of them."

She suddenly felt her breath shorten, "Over my fucking dead body." she yells. She tried to control her thoughts, she knew that if she didn't soon she would trigger another blackout, and she had being trying so hard to deal with them better.

Jason laughed menacingly, as if he had phoned her up just to mess with her again, "Maybe I'm not making myself quite clear." he said.

There was a long silence over the phone before Edward spoke, "We want to go to Singapore, Mum." he told her. Marcella always felt her own children hated her, they always blamed her for something, even when they knew she hadn't. Since their breakup, the kids seemed to turn on her more and more and she saw less and less of them; and when she did see them, they always had an excuse for wanting to be anywhere else.

"Neither of you are going, Edward. You're gonna move back in with me."

"Mum, no. That's not happening." Emma took the phone off of Edward and Marcella knew that Jason could hear every word.

"You see, Marcella? They want absolutely nothing to do with you."

Marcella threw her phone across the room and everything around her began blurring and she felt incredibly disorganised. She vaguely heard the key rattle in the door lock and heard it open so she rushed over and began throwing punches, hoping they landed. It wasn't clear to her who came through the door; she didn't realise it was Tim. Her arms and hands kept coming towards him, and a few had struck his face and nose, causing blood to drip from a few cuts. Grabbing her arms, Tim attempted to stop her from attacking him much longer, "Marcella! Calm down, it's me. It's Tim."

The words _**It's Tim**_ came through to her clear as day and she walked back towards the kitchen still in her fugue state. It took a little while for her to feel like she was back in touch with the real world again.

It felt like she had spent the last few minutes drunk, or like she was having a hangover from a night she doesn't remember, but without much of the sickness. Everything around her felt strange and she didn't feel like herself, and she initially didn't realise she was in her own home. She turned around and Tim sat on the kitchen table with a tissue pressed to his nose, a cut on his upper cheek and a red mark on his jaw. Confusion washed over Marcella, she had a feeling that she had done something, but a part of her wasn't sure if Tim's injuries were caused by her seeing as Jason already tried that trick.

But Tim didn't know about her blackouts; well, not until now anyway, so she knew she had to have caused them.

Tim wasn't angry, he wasn't disappointed, he was upset. Upset that she felt she didn't trust him enough to tell him about whatever that was.

"What was that all about, Marcella?" he questioned. She wasn't sure if she was ready to share all of this about her, it was a huge thing and she was worried it would ruin things for them. Tim on the other hand, wasn't worried about their relationship. Whatever was going on wasn't going to make him think of her any differently, if anything, he wants to help her.

"I- I'm really sorry, Tim." she stuttered. She was always shocked when she realised she had turned violent during a fugue, but she never meant to attack Tim.

Tim didn't need an apology, he needed an explanation.

Marcella walked back into the living room and curled up on the sofa. Tim soon joined her and she snuggled closer to him. She knew that one of the first things she would have to mention was Juliet, and it was something she hadn't told even some of her closest friends. Tim had knew that she had a rough time, but he wasn't quite sure of just how much, and now Marcella needed to tell him.

Just didn't speak for a few minutes, "I want to help you, Marcella." he says in a hushed voice, "But I can't do that if you don't talk to me."

Tim's arms was wrapped around her so tightly and for the first time in a long time, she felt safe. She took a large inhale and her breath was shaky, "I have these blackouts." she begins. Tim didn't speak, he just waited for her to continue explaining, "I've had them for six years. Since my baby died."

He didn't know how to respond to that alone. He didn't know about Juliet, and he couldn't imagine anyone going through the death of their child, let alone when they were still a baby.

"She would've been six now." she sobbed. Tim tightened his hug and kissed her forehead lightly, "Since I lost her, I have these blackouts and I can't remember anything after them. I could've badly hurt you. What if next time, I kill some-"

"Stop." he orders her. "You won't kill anybody."

"How do you know? I don't even know what I'm capable of. What if it happens again with you, and I seriously hurt you?" she argues. The tears streaming down her face from her reddened eyes and she looked at Tim who's face wasn't a look of anxiety or concern, it was a look of gentleness and care. He wanted to help her so much.

"Look, we're gonna get you help. Whatever it takes." he assured her. "We'll find someone who can."

It was the first time that she heard someone actually want to help her. Granted, Jason had only recently found out but he only uses it all against her now. Tim wanted to see her get better, he wanted her to start to live her life again, without being plagued by these fugues.

"We're not going to let this be a part of you any more. I promise you. And I'm not going anywhere so you've always got me. Always." Marcella felt his lips press lightly through her hair and his fingertips run lightly along her upper shoulder. Before Tim knew it, it was suddenly a little bit quieter. Looking down at her, her eyes were closed and her face looked more relaxed and peaceful than it had done in a while.


End file.
